6.11.2014

On Being "Severely Pregnant"

I've been on the small side for most of my pregnancy. It wasn't until about 25 weeks that people start guessing I was pregnant, at least to my face :) It is still shocking to me to look down and see my giant belly protruding or to have somebody ask me when I'm due because I am so obviously pregnant.  At work today, I had a resident refer to me as "severely pregnant." Which is true. I am really, really pregnant.

At 31 weeks and 4 days, I have just over 8 weeks until Evelyn is due. I am less than 2 months away.
And the weird part is, I don't feel that different. I thought that by now, I would really feel like a "mom," or at least a "pre-mom." But as excited as I am for Evelyn's arrival, I am mostly just shocked that it is almost here. Someone is about to send me home with a BABY, and I am going to be responsible for feeding her and clothing her and generally making sure she turns out okay. What?! How can this be possible? I feel so small and inadequate compared to this huge task. I know when she gets here, my ineptitude will only be more apparent. But thank goodness I am not alone!

Every mom friend of mine has told me their own version of this story...coming home with a tiny, helpless human being who is totally in your care...the excitement, the fear, the overwhelming gravity of it. I am so glad to have these friends to call on for reassurance when Evelyn gets here. I am beyond thankful for my amazing mother and mother-in-law, who have already assured me of their excitement and willingness to help in whatever way is needed. And mostly, I am thankful for my wonderful, caring, strong, calm, considerate, and devastatingly good-looking husband, who happens to charm every baby he meets. There is nobody else in this world with whom I could see myself entering this strange new world of parenting.


And so with Evelyn's due date fast-approaching, I guess I need to get used to strangers asking if "it's a boy or a girl" or telling me not to sneeze or I might go into labor. I'm only getting more "severely pregnant" until I go on a major weight-loss program via the birth of this baby. And even if I don't yet feel quite like a real-life mom, I am a mom already. And every comment and joke just serves as a reminder of how close I am to meeting my precious little girl. And that's alright by me!

No comments: